Two years ago today I was released from Perryville Women’s prison in Goodyear, AZ. It was a beautiful March day as it so often is in this part of the world. I was up at 4 o’clock in the morning.. The release process included a lot of waiting, but finally about 10 o’clock the huge chain link gates slid open and I was able to walk out, free, into the welcoming arms of my friend Carolyn.
I was starving and she took me appropriately to Paradise for my first meal. The choices overwhelmed me, but I knew whatever I had must include tomatoes. I had missed them so much in seven years. So I ordered a huge, lovely salad and welcomed glass of ice water. The girl behind the counter handed me an empty glass. Where was my water? I’d been gone a long time and now discovered that there was a buffet of drink choices to my left that included tea, soft drinks, lemonade and coffee. But where was the water? My friend pointed to a small black button on the drink buffet that said, in tiny letters, Water. So I pushed it and was horrified to get lemonade. Oh, my gosh! Were they now going to charge me for that? Maybe they would send me back to Perryville. As it turned out, my fears were unfounded. I was supposed to pull, not push. Obviously I had a lot to learn.
And learn I have. It has been an amazing, full and fulfilling time. Today I was the guest speaker at the Phoenix Rotary 100 to about 200 guests. Someone asked me how I survived prison. Faith, focus and purpose. Oh, and a sense of humor helps, although some days I cried enough to float the place away. Why it’s still there, I do not know.
The Rotarians were lovely and welcoming. It was a perfect way to celebrate this anniversary, this strange anniversary of a journey that gave me my purpose and passion.
Here are some numbers I shared with the Rotarians to think about. MA, WA, and AZ all have about 6.5 million people, give or take a few hundred thousand. MA has a prison pollution of 11,000. WA has a prison population of 17,000. AZ has a prison population of 40,000. (According ADOC, 6,000 are whom they call “criminal aliens.”) We release 20,000 a year and that sounds really good, but here’s the bad news: we intake 22,000 so the numbers keep rising. Currently the corrections budget is just under 0ne Billion Dollars. Yes, One Billion Dollars.
Do we have that much more crime? Not really. We just send more people to prison for longer sentences because we are Tough on Crime. The alternative seems to be Soft on Crime. I propose there is a third choice, Smart on Crime. Check out what conservative politicians are saying nationally about this idea at www.rightoncrime.com. Former legislators who started as Tough on Crime are now looking at smarter alternatives and becoming Smart on Crime.
That’s my passion and that’s what I am celebrating this year. I’m also celebrating new friendships with amazing people in my life that thrill me with their loving and generous spirits. Thank you all. I send all my love and blessings.
Think about your last two years. Have you found a passion and purpose that you are celebrating? I promise, it makes life worth living. I’d love to hear what yours is….
Hi, Sue Ellen! Last week I celebrated my one-year release anniversary (after just 25 months.) I did not have the culture shock that you experienced: in fact, I just picked up where I left off, almost as if it had been a dream. I will say that the support and loving spirit of my friends, family and even strangers helped enormously! As for the ‘smart on crime’ idea: KUDOS! I am going to investigate that website. My question is: With an almost $1billion budget (which was not cut this time), WHERE IS THE MONEY? My friends in Perryville tell me that nearly all programs have been cut as well as most of the jobs and ALL of the education except for mandatory. San Carlos, the new minimum security facility, is locked down much of the time and the officers have nothing to do but inspections which take place 2 or 3 times a day. They now want to charge visitors $25 apiece for the “privelege” of visiting and plan to keep 1% of prisoners spendable $ for “banking fees”. This is insane and, in and of itself, criminal.
Sue Ellen you are amazing and awesome
Not the typical inmate which is what makes you so truly
awesome
I do believe that God had and has a plan which you seem to be fullfilling
Keep it up my friend and I will help where ever I can.
I have learned a lot through my criminal justice classes to know that sending people to prison does not fix the crime problem, and yes, it costs a ridiculous amount of money. Most that leave prison, leave in much worse condition than they came in, and commit more crimes or the same crimes.
I do hope they are really willing to make a change and find prevention measures, like early childhood education and development along with rehabilitation is the best way to fix the issue of crime. Not locking up and throwing away the key.
I am not sure if I have found a passion and/or purpose. I want to believe we all have a reason to be here…on Earth, but I have yet to realize mine.
Karin, whether or not you’ve been to prison, you’ve got it exactly right. Prison is nothing more than a very costly warehouse for people who really need education and rehabilitation, not non-stop inspections where their meager possessions are often trashed and demeaning strip searches every time they turn around. If the non-violent inmates were doing community service and going to school, there would be enormous tax relief and jobs that we now pay people to do for the community would be done for nothing. Offenders need to be occupied by tasks which not only improve their environment but also develop their self-esteem and teach a work ethic.
Oh, Karin, you are on the right track, just realizing it’s important and keeping your eyes open. I didn’t find mine until I was in prison. You are so right. Prison just makes it worse. An ASU professor told me that the average person makes 6,000 decisions a day, small and large. The average inmate makes 600. Imagine that shock when you are released.
You might want to follow http://www.cecilash.com/ He is really trying to make a postitive, economically sound difference and couldn’t get his bills heard this session. It’s a slow process to make a law, like watching sleepy snails slog up a mountain.
Sue Ellen,
The reason AZ has a higher prison population is because we have “private prisons” where prisoners from other states (including Hawaii and Maine) are shipped to Arizona to serve their sentence. So although your numbers are riveting, they are wholey inaccurate and misleading. While I respect what you are trying to do, you need to educate yourself better on what is really happening before you go out giving misinformation to people. Numbers can be read however you want them to. But you must find out the facts behind the numbers in order to ensure you interpret them correctly. Once you do this, you may find Arizona is not out of line in numbers at all.
Thanks so much for your comment. Actually, I get my stats right from ADOC’s website. I am very particular to give facts that can be researched. You are so right. Accuracy is very important. Please check http://www.azcorrections.gov/adc/reports/CAG/CAGMar11.pdf for their numbers. The ADOC link posts the figures every month. In March there were 40, 152 inmates. 5,087 were from private prisons. 34, 559 are US Citizens and 5, 593 are what ADOC calls criminal aliens. It still puts us much higher than those other states with similar populations. Also check out the Pew Foundation website, http://www.pewtrusts.org/ and http://www.jailovercrowding.com/index/the-problem. That site gives prison population and state population, Sometimes it’s a little off but not too much. I know that what I say can be researched very easily. The facts are very important to me.
I have read many of your pages and blogs. It put me right back there again. Walking across that same field, dealing with the same incompitent medical… That was ’92-’93. Amazing how some things never change. You hope and pray they will but they don’t. Seems it might have even gotten worse since I was there. One woman died while I was there because she was a diabetic that needed her insulin. She was moved from one prison to another and her medical records failed to follow on the same trip. She tried to tell them she neede her meds but they wouldn’t listen. She started having siesures. By the time they got an ambulance to her she wasn’t breathing. They later informed us she passed away on the way to the hospital. We knew better. They only told us that to cover themselves. I cried for days. To them it was just another day and she became just another number.
You might want to check out this site:
http://arizonaprisonwatch.blogspot.com/
She really keeps up with what is happening inside.
Thanks so much for writing. Keep telling people the stories.
WOW…I read your words and I am flooded with emotions. I was released in Dec 2009. I met women that I would have never had the pleasure of meeting in my former life. I seen and heard things that I shocked, horrified and scared the hell out of me.
As I type this, my tears are flowing. If I could reach through and give you a hug, I would. I will pray for you as well as continued strength.
God Bless you!
Wow, I feel your vitual hug. When I was released, one of the things I did was go to a local thrift store and buy a soft brown teddy bear for 75 cents. I wanted something to hug. I longed to pet a dog and cat. I know we all missed softness.
Bless you for writing. I appreciate the stories.
Hi Sue Ellen, I wrote before and i guess i’m doing something wrong because my message was never answered. So, I am trying again. I don’t know if you remember me, but i am Carol Parra I use to be across from you at Piestewa. You helped me with my chemical dependency courses. Anyways, I’ve been out for a year now got a great job, but I had a seisure at work, then found out I had lesions in my head and had brain surgery. Its been one heck of a mess, but I know God has great plans for me I’m just kind of lost. Can I talk to you. Sincerely, Carol Parra
Note to Carol Parra: I, too, haven’t had any of my mail to SueEllen answered, but I guess she’s pretty busy with Gina’s Team and also has some health issues right now. I didn’t know her………she was gone before I got there, but a good friend of mine at SACRC did. I was in prison for 2 years and had finally gotten to Rosa, which I loved (relatively speaking of course,) when the up and sent me to SACRC. I was very upset, but wound up liking it best of all. I have been home for 16 months and certainly don’t miss it! Do you live in Phx? Always happy to correspond. Muffy flightful@aol.com
Muffy thank you for answering these computers can get to me because i don’t understand how to work them to well. Anyways I pray Sue ellen is doing well. Muffy where are you and do you work? I need help and I don’t know where to start. Right now i am waiting for social security, but no income in coming in, so i don’t know what to do
Carol, I am in Phoenix. You can call me at 602-230-1513 and leave a message if I’m not here. I should be here all afternoon, though and probably this evening. Don’t know if I can help you, but I’m happy to try! Talk to you soon. Muffy
My baby#youngest just got sentenced to 6.5 years. I’m so scared. Just let me know she Will be ok